"Paris Hilton: Go to Jail! Go Directly to Jail Where You'll Find Your Very Own Luxury Suite!!!"
May 20th 2007 06:57
Well if this doesn't take the cake!
Paris Hilton WILL go to jail. That seems clear. But the details are endless and quite frankly disgraceful!
Reports last week from within the Californian Justice Department claimed that Paris might be released after only a few hours on the inside due to overcrowding within the prison system.
The Office of the District Attorney instantly replied that Paris was to be made an example of (and one could almost hear the DA salivate as he said the word "example"!) and would serve a minimum of 23 days on the inside - assuming she behaves herself that is.
Her 45 day prison sentence can be legitimately shortened under a Californian program designed to promote Good-Behaviour in da big house.
Well fair enough. If that's standard fare, why complain?
Next report. Paris is worried about what will happen to her inside. More specifically she's worried about her safety. As I-Dream-of-Hollywood has suggested before, inmates don't take kindly to airheaded blonde heiresses! Papparazzi photographers, however, do! Especially the incarcerated kind! Especially if their name happens to be Paris Hilton!
Legitimate concerns.
Paris was reportedly concerned that she would either be harmed by an inmate or that her reputation and public image would be damaged (can you imagine?!) by pictures snapped of her on the inside.
The DA once again responded, warning the press to keep their mits off, and that any trespassers during Ms Hilton's days on the inside would find themselves in a cell in the next complex!
Then came the punchline...
Paris, presuming she did not continue with her planned appeal, would be given a special cell designed to carry incarcerated Police Officers and Celebrities away from the rest of the prison, out of reach of the inmates and out of the spotlight. A.k.a. special treatment.
Paris replied with a statement in which she fatalistically claimed to have resigned herself to her fate and cancelled all plans of appeal.
What a shock.
It seems that the Hilton's do indeed have hotels everywhere.
Poor Paris. She's going to have such a rough 23 days (or less). No doubt a cameraman will run the gauntlet and snap a picture of her inside. No doubt she will be hurt and horrified and Hollywood will be outraged - and reap the profits by mass publication. No doubt Paris will emerge "a sadder and wiser engine" - and pick up exactly where she left off!!!!!
Now isn't that what prisons are suppossed to prevent?
Paris Hilton WILL go to jail. That seems clear. But the details are endless and quite frankly disgraceful!
Reports last week from within the Californian Justice Department claimed that Paris might be released after only a few hours on the inside due to overcrowding within the prison system.
The Office of the District Attorney instantly replied that Paris was to be made an example of (and one could almost hear the DA salivate as he said the word "example"!) and would serve a minimum of 23 days on the inside - assuming she behaves herself that is.
Her 45 day prison sentence can be legitimately shortened under a Californian program designed to promote Good-Behaviour in da big house.
Next report. Paris is worried about what will happen to her inside. More specifically she's worried about her safety. As I-Dream-of-Hollywood has suggested before, inmates don't take kindly to airheaded blonde heiresses! Papparazzi photographers, however, do! Especially the incarcerated kind! Especially if their name happens to be Paris Hilton!
Legitimate concerns.
Paris was reportedly concerned that she would either be harmed by an inmate or that her reputation and public image would be damaged (can you imagine?!) by pictures snapped of her on the inside.
The DA once again responded, warning the press to keep their mits off, and that any trespassers during Ms Hilton's days on the inside would find themselves in a cell in the next complex!
Then came the punchline...
Paris, presuming she did not continue with her planned appeal, would be given a special cell designed to carry incarcerated Police Officers and Celebrities away from the rest of the prison, out of reach of the inmates and out of the spotlight. A.k.a. special treatment.
What a shock.
It seems that the Hilton's do indeed have hotels everywhere.
Poor Paris. She's going to have such a rough 23 days (or less). No doubt a cameraman will run the gauntlet and snap a picture of her inside. No doubt she will be hurt and horrified and Hollywood will be outraged - and reap the profits by mass publication. No doubt Paris will emerge "a sadder and wiser engine" - and pick up exactly where she left off!!!!!
Now isn't that what prisons are suppossed to prevent?
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