JourneywomanFantasy Films R'Us
July 5th 2007 07:06
With the uber-mega-multi-billion dollar success of The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Hollywood has spent the past half decade leaping all over itself to declare that the epic movie is back. Popularised from the moment cinema was popular by directors such as D.W. Griffith, Cecil B. DeMille, Joseph Manckiewicz, Stanley Kubrick, Stephen Spielberg and so on, the epic movie genre is easily the best way (short of an overdose) to flood the brain with endorfins and the body with adrenhalin.
We love it and who could blame us? Those action sequences rule and the people are hot! Unless they're evil minions, in which case they're hideous. But the final point is always those endorfins!
Epic movies give us a very smooth high and the fantasy genre especially so. Some good sword wielding violence coupled with some flashy magical schtick is always cool!
However, the period fantasy epic had been languishing throughout the 90's, with a series of stinkers drowning at the box-office and suggesting to the Hollywood big guns that all that cash laid out for weapons and armour and horses and the like was just not worth it!
Instead a quick bit of work at the blue screen and behind the computer in the photo-shop lab could bring a nice robotic villain and his mutated nemesis (fresh from the pages of Marvel Comics) to life and start the cash rolling in!
Lord of the Rings re-convinced studio's that a big investment in a period piece would bring in a very powerful return and since then everybody's been doing it!
The Chronicles of Narnia had audiences salivating all accross the globe. The result was a bit kidsy cutesy but then that's Disney for you. The sequel (Prince Caspian) is due for release in 2008 while this year a decent string of from story-book to screen fantasy epics are on there way. Though it has to be said, some look more epic than others...
Stardust
Release Date: September 20
Cast: Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, Peter O'Toole, Rickey Gervais, Robert DeNiro, Rupert Everett, Sienna Millar
View Trailer Here!
Original Book by: Neil Gaiman and Charles Vess
And it's about: Basically a weedy guy (Charlie Cox) has this hot chick (Sienna Millar) who isn't really all that keen. So when they see a falling star he says he'll go off and get it for her. To do so he passes through a portal in a stone wall into a fantasy world where a whole bunch of people are after the fallen star - who has just happened to turn into a lucious babe (Claire Danes)! A witch (Michelle Pfieffer) and her sisters, rendered old and ugly for some reason, want the star to regain their lustrous youthful look. That and the king of this fantasy world (Peter O'Toole) is almost out for the count and his four sons (and three ghosts) are after the star as they vie for Daddy's affections and the throne. On the way there are mafia like traders (Ricky Gervais), pirates (Robert DeNiro), and lots of wacky and inventive ideas like zeppelin-pirate ships. It's sounds a little bit too kooky yes, but the cast is nie on impeccable while the story could be worse. It's classic boy gets girl for sure and no doubt there is a magically sickening end sequence where young weedy guy and lucious babe decide they were meant for each other... but Michelle Pfeiffer as a hot evil witch, Robert DeNiro as a pirate, Ricky Gervais as a mafia Don and Peter O'Toole as himself is enough of a draw to make the ick-factor go down a bit.
Rating: Three out of Five for a hot cast - two stars lost for sentimental romantic yuck.
Beowulf
Release Date: November 29
Cast: Angelina Jolie, Anthony Hopkins, Crispin Glover, Robin Wright-Penn, Ray Winestone, John Malkovich, Brendan Gleeson
Check the Official Website Here!
Original Book by: it's actually based on England's national epic!
And it's about: Basically here we have a warrior on the rise (Ray Winestone) named Beowulf, who sets out to help the neighbouring kingdom of Heorot ruled over by King Hrothgar (Anthony Hopkins) who are being terrorised by some kind of mutant outcast named Grendel (Crispin Glover). He wacks Grendel in a mighty battle which unfortunately pisses of Grendel's Momma (Angelina Jolie). She takes up her late sons terror tactics forcing poor Beowulf to kill her! How DOES he sleep at night??? Beowulf then returns home to his own kingdom - greatly rewarded for his efforts - and eventually becomes King. Unfortunately he can't seem to turn a trick as a troublesome dragon pops up and during the battle Beowulf is killed. In short, mighty saga with much sword fighting, fantastical effects and Angelina Jolie boobage! This smacks a little of the lameness that was Dragonheart and frankly the presence of a decidedly "supporting actor" rich cast gives us no confidence! However, Angelina Jolie proved in Alexander that she really CAN play mothers while Anthony Hopkins and Robin Wright-Penn are not to be sniffed at. Biggest problem? It's going to be animated! Whoa now! Hold up there Hollywood! Shrek is animated! Penguins are animated! Even cullinary French rats are animated! But mass violence??? This will either suck, or re-define what you can get away with in a CGI movie.
Rating: Two out of five for being animated and for an iffy cast, but this may change if it proves to be revolutionary and far reaching! A teaser trailer would really help!
The Golden Compass
Release Date: December 26
Cast: Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig, John Hurt, Eva Green, Kevin Bacon, Eric Bana, Sam Elliot, Magda Szubanski and Dakota Blue Richards
View Trailer Here!
Original Book By: Phillip Pullman
And it's about: In a universe parallel to our own, a girl named Lyra Belcqua (Newcomer Dakota Blue Richards) hears something she shouldn't and gets drawn into an international controversy involving kidnapped children, the church, a mysterious substance called Dust and parallel worlds. She must travel to the Arctic where Dust can be found, overcoming a great many perils along the way, including many people within the church (who would rather see Dust and all those who know about it destroyed!), some scientists who are using children as lab rats to test the uses and effects of Dust, some seriously hot witches (Eva Green) and some bad-ass talking polar bears! It sounds kinda corny yes but if you haven't read the books then go and do so. This movie is based on a rivetting fantasy thriller sporting some amazing characters - inlcuding a very hot religious authority/witch(?) played by Nicole Kidman... sizzle!!! This flick has the best cast of any fantasy film of the year and the smartest looking effects. With New Line Cinema's billion dollar empire behind it and WETA special effects, it looks set to be huge! Fans of the books are already nitpicking so we are restrained from gushing too much just yet!
Rating: Four stars for a hot cast, amazing effects and a great story. This situation will alter depending on how mangled (or not) it becomes on screen.
Enchanted
Release Date: December 26 (expect this to change)
Cast: Amy Adams, Patrick Dempsey, James Marsden, Susan Sarandon, Idina Menzel, Timothy Spall, Rachel Covey and Julie Andrews as the narrator
View Trailer Here!
Original Book By: the nice (vomit!!!) people at Disney - making this the only not based on literature fantasy epic of the year!
And it's about: A fairy tale princess (Amy Adams) who has everything living in a Disney-fied animated world (that's the old-skool 2D animation mind you!) is enchanted into our world (!) in the flesh by an evil witch (Susan Sarandon). In this strange new existence she finds that her own social norms just aren't cricket! For starters, people aren't nice, men aren't noble, princesses wear Gucci pantsuits these days - not taffetta, love is not everelasting, animals are not suppossed to clean house for you and you don't burst into song everytime you have an emotional dilema! She is followed by her fantasy world handsome prince (James Marsden) out to rescue her and by the witch as well, out to make sure that Happily Ever After dies biyatches!!! Patrick Dempsey of Grey's Anatomy and McDreamy fame plays a down to earth New York lawyer who said princess gets the hots for while Broadway diva's Idina Menzel and Julie Andrews are thrown in for laughs. The ending is advertised as an ultimate and hilarious test of the notion of happily ever after! Well! What can we say? Animated films have spent the past decade taking the piss out of the Disney format. Why shouldn't Disney grab a piece of the action? Check the trailer and you'll find that this cutesy rip-off delight is actually filled with spunk and irreverence. The part where James Marsden starts a love ballad and is clobbered by a herd of triatheletes on bikes is our definite favourite! The fact that it's Disney - who are definitely not "cool" right now is a slight detractor, but all in all this could be some good nasty fun! We'll see.
Rating: Three and a half stars with one gone because it will probably have a sickeningly romantic ending anyway and a half star because it's Disney. However, just one look at Susan Sarandon as the evil witch is enough to want to make us put them back! God I hope this isn't another Bridge to Terabithia!!!
The Spiderwick Chronicles
Release Date: Greater Union says... December 26 but IMDB says... April 3 - take your pick, but frankly given how crappy this looks, the April 3 date seems the more likely
Cast: Sarah Bolger, Freddie Highmore, Seth Rogen, Mary-Louise Parker, Nick Nolte, David Straithern, Martin Short, Joan Plowright
Check the Official Websites for the Books here!
Original Books By: Holly Black and Tony DiTerrlizzi
And it's about: Some kids and their family move into an old and rambling estate in New England USA called Sipderwick Estate. Inside they find a field guide to faerie's and exploration soon proves that the estate is full of them! Some are nice and some aren't! And they all want the book! I've never read this juvenile literature series but from what I can gather it's one big tug of war with a series of fantasy fuzz-balls set against the background of "oh-dear-they've-destroyed-th e-house-I-wonder-if-Mommy-wil l-notice?" Schmeh! The presence of a decidedly made-for-TV-movie cast - including Martin "what career?" Short and Joan "call me Lady Olivier!" Plowright - is not a winning factor. This will be a low budget nothing that seven year olds will gobble up on DVD and quickly discard.
Rating: One star for the sheer blandness of it all! No way will this get a Boxing Day release!
Well that's it! My bet is on The Golden Compass and Stardust to a lesser extent - but Enchanted is my official pick for outside favourite.
Release dates will be defined (as usual) by their reception at previews and how well they fare at the US box-office. Stardust has already changed dates a few times and looks pretty static for now. The Golden Compass is set for a December 7 release in the US and may be pushed back into January if its box-office is weaker than expected... but somehow I doubt that will happen!
Enchanted will most likely go under the knife first and end up with a February release. That said, Disney is doing well at the international box-office right now, and big budget releases are getting openings Down Under ahead of their US release dates with surprising frequency - think Eragon, Spiderman 3 and Transformers.
Eitherway there's either a great deal of magic to be had or a great deal of corn! Stay tuned for reviews...
We love it and who could blame us? Those action sequences rule and the people are hot! Unless they're evil minions, in which case they're hideous. But the final point is always those endorfins!
However, the period fantasy epic had been languishing throughout the 90's, with a series of stinkers drowning at the box-office and suggesting to the Hollywood big guns that all that cash laid out for weapons and armour and horses and the like was just not worth it!
Instead a quick bit of work at the blue screen and behind the computer in the photo-shop lab could bring a nice robotic villain and his mutated nemesis (fresh from the pages of Marvel Comics) to life and start the cash rolling in!
Lord of the Rings re-convinced studio's that a big investment in a period piece would bring in a very powerful return and since then everybody's been doing it!
The Chronicles of Narnia had audiences salivating all accross the globe. The result was a bit kidsy cutesy but then that's Disney for you. The sequel (Prince Caspian) is due for release in 2008 while this year a decent string of from story-book to screen fantasy epics are on there way. Though it has to be said, some look more epic than others...
Stardust
Release Date: September 20
Cast: Claire Danes, Michelle Pfeiffer, Peter O'Toole, Rickey Gervais, Robert DeNiro, Rupert Everett, Sienna Millar
View Trailer Here!
Original Book by: Neil Gaiman and Charles Vess
And it's about: Basically a weedy guy (Charlie Cox) has this hot chick (Sienna Millar) who isn't really all that keen. So when they see a falling star he says he'll go off and get it for her. To do so he passes through a portal in a stone wall into a fantasy world where a whole bunch of people are after the fallen star - who has just happened to turn into a lucious babe (Claire Danes)! A witch (Michelle Pfieffer) and her sisters, rendered old and ugly for some reason, want the star to regain their lustrous youthful look. That and the king of this fantasy world (Peter O'Toole) is almost out for the count and his four sons (and three ghosts) are after the star as they vie for Daddy's affections and the throne. On the way there are mafia like traders (Ricky Gervais), pirates (Robert DeNiro), and lots of wacky and inventive ideas like zeppelin-pirate ships. It's sounds a little bit too kooky yes, but the cast is nie on impeccable while the story could be worse. It's classic boy gets girl for sure and no doubt there is a magically sickening end sequence where young weedy guy and lucious babe decide they were meant for each other... but Michelle Pfeiffer as a hot evil witch, Robert DeNiro as a pirate, Ricky Gervais as a mafia Don and Peter O'Toole as himself is enough of a draw to make the ick-factor go down a bit.
Rating: Three out of Five for a hot cast - two stars lost for sentimental romantic yuck.
Beowulf
Release Date: November 29
Cast: Angelina Jolie, Anthony Hopkins, Crispin Glover, Robin Wright-Penn, Ray Winestone, John Malkovich, Brendan Gleeson
Check the Official Website Here!
Original Book by: it's actually based on England's national epic!
And it's about: Basically here we have a warrior on the rise (Ray Winestone) named Beowulf, who sets out to help the neighbouring kingdom of Heorot ruled over by King Hrothgar (Anthony Hopkins) who are being terrorised by some kind of mutant outcast named Grendel (Crispin Glover). He wacks Grendel in a mighty battle which unfortunately pisses of Grendel's Momma (Angelina Jolie). She takes up her late sons terror tactics forcing poor Beowulf to kill her! How DOES he sleep at night??? Beowulf then returns home to his own kingdom - greatly rewarded for his efforts - and eventually becomes King. Unfortunately he can't seem to turn a trick as a troublesome dragon pops up and during the battle Beowulf is killed. In short, mighty saga with much sword fighting, fantastical effects and Angelina Jolie boobage! This smacks a little of the lameness that was Dragonheart and frankly the presence of a decidedly "supporting actor" rich cast gives us no confidence! However, Angelina Jolie proved in Alexander that she really CAN play mothers while Anthony Hopkins and Robin Wright-Penn are not to be sniffed at. Biggest problem? It's going to be animated! Whoa now! Hold up there Hollywood! Shrek is animated! Penguins are animated! Even cullinary French rats are animated! But mass violence??? This will either suck, or re-define what you can get away with in a CGI movie.
Rating: Two out of five for being animated and for an iffy cast, but this may change if it proves to be revolutionary and far reaching! A teaser trailer would really help!
The Golden Compass
Release Date: December 26
Cast: Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig, John Hurt, Eva Green, Kevin Bacon, Eric Bana, Sam Elliot, Magda Szubanski and Dakota Blue Richards
View Trailer Here!
Original Book By: Phillip Pullman
And it's about: In a universe parallel to our own, a girl named Lyra Belcqua (Newcomer Dakota Blue Richards) hears something she shouldn't and gets drawn into an international controversy involving kidnapped children, the church, a mysterious substance called Dust and parallel worlds. She must travel to the Arctic where Dust can be found, overcoming a great many perils along the way, including many people within the church (who would rather see Dust and all those who know about it destroyed!), some scientists who are using children as lab rats to test the uses and effects of Dust, some seriously hot witches (Eva Green) and some bad-ass talking polar bears! It sounds kinda corny yes but if you haven't read the books then go and do so. This movie is based on a rivetting fantasy thriller sporting some amazing characters - inlcuding a very hot religious authority/witch(?) played by Nicole Kidman... sizzle!!! This flick has the best cast of any fantasy film of the year and the smartest looking effects. With New Line Cinema's billion dollar empire behind it and WETA special effects, it looks set to be huge! Fans of the books are already nitpicking so we are restrained from gushing too much just yet!
Rating: Four stars for a hot cast, amazing effects and a great story. This situation will alter depending on how mangled (or not) it becomes on screen.
Enchanted
Release Date: December 26 (expect this to change)
Cast: Amy Adams, Patrick Dempsey, James Marsden, Susan Sarandon, Idina Menzel, Timothy Spall, Rachel Covey and Julie Andrews as the narrator
View Trailer Here!
Original Book By: the nice (vomit!!!) people at Disney - making this the only not based on literature fantasy epic of the year!
And it's about: A fairy tale princess (Amy Adams) who has everything living in a Disney-fied animated world (that's the old-skool 2D animation mind you!) is enchanted into our world (!) in the flesh by an evil witch (Susan Sarandon). In this strange new existence she finds that her own social norms just aren't cricket! For starters, people aren't nice, men aren't noble, princesses wear Gucci pantsuits these days - not taffetta, love is not everelasting, animals are not suppossed to clean house for you and you don't burst into song everytime you have an emotional dilema! She is followed by her fantasy world handsome prince (James Marsden) out to rescue her and by the witch as well, out to make sure that Happily Ever After dies biyatches!!! Patrick Dempsey of Grey's Anatomy and McDreamy fame plays a down to earth New York lawyer who said princess gets the hots for while Broadway diva's Idina Menzel and Julie Andrews are thrown in for laughs. The ending is advertised as an ultimate and hilarious test of the notion of happily ever after! Well! What can we say? Animated films have spent the past decade taking the piss out of the Disney format. Why shouldn't Disney grab a piece of the action? Check the trailer and you'll find that this cutesy rip-off delight is actually filled with spunk and irreverence. The part where James Marsden starts a love ballad and is clobbered by a herd of triatheletes on bikes is our definite favourite! The fact that it's Disney - who are definitely not "cool" right now is a slight detractor, but all in all this could be some good nasty fun! We'll see.
Rating: Three and a half stars with one gone because it will probably have a sickeningly romantic ending anyway and a half star because it's Disney. However, just one look at Susan Sarandon as the evil witch is enough to want to make us put them back! God I hope this isn't another Bridge to Terabithia!!!
The Spiderwick Chronicles
Release Date: Greater Union says... December 26 but IMDB says... April 3 - take your pick, but frankly given how crappy this looks, the April 3 date seems the more likely
Cast: Sarah Bolger, Freddie Highmore, Seth Rogen, Mary-Louise Parker, Nick Nolte, David Straithern, Martin Short, Joan Plowright
Check the Official Websites for the Books here!
Original Books By: Holly Black and Tony DiTerrlizzi
And it's about: Some kids and their family move into an old and rambling estate in New England USA called Sipderwick Estate. Inside they find a field guide to faerie's and exploration soon proves that the estate is full of them! Some are nice and some aren't! And they all want the book! I've never read this juvenile literature series but from what I can gather it's one big tug of war with a series of fantasy fuzz-balls set against the background of "oh-dear-they've-destroyed-th e-house-I-wonder-if-Mommy-wil l-notice?" Schmeh! The presence of a decidedly made-for-TV-movie cast - including Martin "what career?" Short and Joan "call me Lady Olivier!" Plowright - is not a winning factor. This will be a low budget nothing that seven year olds will gobble up on DVD and quickly discard.
Rating: One star for the sheer blandness of it all! No way will this get a Boxing Day release!
Well that's it! My bet is on The Golden Compass and Stardust to a lesser extent - but Enchanted is my official pick for outside favourite.
Release dates will be defined (as usual) by their reception at previews and how well they fare at the US box-office. Stardust has already changed dates a few times and looks pretty static for now. The Golden Compass is set for a December 7 release in the US and may be pushed back into January if its box-office is weaker than expected... but somehow I doubt that will happen!
Enchanted will most likely go under the knife first and end up with a February release. That said, Disney is doing well at the international box-office right now, and big budget releases are getting openings Down Under ahead of their US release dates with surprising frequency - think Eragon, Spiderman 3 and Transformers.
Eitherway there's either a great deal of magic to be had or a great deal of corn! Stay tuned for reviews...
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Comment by JohnDoe
Film & TV on DVD
I loved Neil Gaiman Sandman graphic novels and the film of Mirrormask was highly captivating. The trailer for Stardust looks cheap and the dialogue sounds over ripe. Fingers crossed that the end result is better.
Beowulf is of course one of the richest fantasy novels ever written and highly influential. I think that a CG rendering of the epic battle could be delicious.
What was wrong with Bridge to Terabithia by the way. I know the trailer was misleading but as a real world fantasy (EG: Pan's Labyrinth) it was a touching and imaginative gem. Impressively treating children as adults and dealing with sincere human emotion.
Great post, keep up the fine work.