Celeb Wars: Dina vs Donald
July 31st 2007 03:22
Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear!
Remember that little piece of advice Donald Trump had for Lindsay Lohan?
“Find what you love doing (other than drugs and alcohol), work hard, stay focused, get a new set of parents."
Well it seems La Ma Lohan heard about it one night before the Jack Daniels kicked in and so she fired back with this searing little soliloquy... seriously, I'm sure somewhere Donald Trump is cowering under an 18th century Oak desk with a bottle of metho wondering why he ever dared speak out against the Imperial might and Majesty of Dina Lohan!!!
“Donald, I’m really disappointed in the statement that was brought to my attention. I’ve always had a great admiration for your business sense and I’ve read all your books and learned from them! Your own brother died of alcoholism and you own Trump Vodka? You say Lindsay needs new parents? Such a rash statement without backing it with fact? I am a single mother of four children doing what I can during this difficult time! Do a background check of both parents and you will find the truth! Shame on you… so many families suffer from this, yours included. We need solutions not opinions! - Dina and family”
She might as well just say "we are NOT amused BIYATCH!!!" Much good will it do her. Clearly from this sophisticated Phillippic we are meant to garner that Dina Lohan is a serious business woman who reads the plum of all investment and business management editorials - I mean you can't go past Donald Trump in that department right?!
We are also meant to garner that Donald Trump is really just an uncaring lush with bad genes who likes making people suffer (probably while sticking forks into his hands) by forcing them to drink Trump label Vodka!
More over, Dina likes everything to be substantiated by fact. Clearly this is why she is flooding the market with "reasons" as to why her daughter was drunk, driving dangerously, in posession of cocaine, ran over a boys foot (for which he's suing!) and stalked both her assistant and her mother!
Oh yeah, and Dina likes her some geneaology, which is why she told Donald Trump to do a background check on his parents!
Oh yeah, somewhere in there surely it says that she is a caring mother who is too busy doing everything in her power to protect her daughter... well doesn't it?
But the final sentence is what gets me the most... "we need solutions not opinions!"
Yes Dina. The world owes you an answer. Why should you have to think of one?!
I will not follow a rant with a rant about the rant... but were I to do so words like, "shameless," "mindless," "tactless," "idiotic" and "selfish as all hell" would be in it you can be sure.
However, Dina isn't just messing with anyone here. This is Donald Trump, the guy who took on Rosie O'Donnell! And that takes serious balls - and serious stupidity.
Dina Lohan is small-fry by comparison... and she just insulted his parents, his Vodka and pretty much everything but his hairpiece - and I bet that was a close run thing, only Dina probably can't spell toupee!
Let the battle begin. For once I'm with trump. Bring the stupid cow down!
Who's taking care of Lindsay while all this is going on?!
Remember that little piece of advice Donald Trump had for Lindsay Lohan?
“Find what you love doing (other than drugs and alcohol), work hard, stay focused, get a new set of parents."
Well it seems La Ma Lohan heard about it one night before the Jack Daniels kicked in and so she fired back with this searing little soliloquy... seriously, I'm sure somewhere Donald Trump is cowering under an 18th century Oak desk with a bottle of metho wondering why he ever dared speak out against the Imperial might and Majesty of Dina Lohan!!!
“Donald, I’m really disappointed in the statement that was brought to my attention. I’ve always had a great admiration for your business sense and I’ve read all your books and learned from them! Your own brother died of alcoholism and you own Trump Vodka? You say Lindsay needs new parents? Such a rash statement without backing it with fact? I am a single mother of four children doing what I can during this difficult time! Do a background check of both parents and you will find the truth! Shame on you… so many families suffer from this, yours included. We need solutions not opinions! - Dina and family”
She might as well just say "we are NOT amused BIYATCH!!!" Much good will it do her. Clearly from this sophisticated Phillippic we are meant to garner that Dina Lohan is a serious business woman who reads the plum of all investment and business management editorials - I mean you can't go past Donald Trump in that department right?!
More over, Dina likes everything to be substantiated by fact. Clearly this is why she is flooding the market with "reasons" as to why her daughter was drunk, driving dangerously, in posession of cocaine, ran over a boys foot (for which he's suing!) and stalked both her assistant and her mother!
Oh yeah, and Dina likes her some geneaology, which is why she told Donald Trump to do a background check on his parents!
Oh yeah, somewhere in there surely it says that she is a caring mother who is too busy doing everything in her power to protect her daughter... well doesn't it?
But the final sentence is what gets me the most... "we need solutions not opinions!"
Yes Dina. The world owes you an answer. Why should you have to think of one?!
I will not follow a rant with a rant about the rant... but were I to do so words like, "shameless," "mindless," "tactless," "idiotic" and "selfish as all hell" would be in it you can be sure.
However, Dina isn't just messing with anyone here. This is Donald Trump, the guy who took on Rosie O'Donnell! And that takes serious balls - and serious stupidity.
Dina Lohan is small-fry by comparison... and she just insulted his parents, his Vodka and pretty much everything but his hairpiece - and I bet that was a close run thing, only Dina probably can't spell toupee!
Let the battle begin. For once I'm with trump. Bring the stupid cow down!
Who's taking care of Lindsay while all this is going on?!
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